Wednesday, January 5, 2011

The MVA is my frienemy

Ever since I can remember I've had a strained relationship with the MVA. Even before I could drive I felt like they were out to get me. I know what your thinking. I'm going to complain about long lines and self righteous bureaucrats. My relationship with the MVA is more like Spy vs Spy.


Give or take 15 years ago I began my tumultuous relationship with the MVA. When I was 17. Like every other kid I was looking forward to getting the coveted "learner's permit". The first step toward getting a driver's license which translates into Independence. I'm not going to bore you with details of my written test, just know that finally after the 7th attempt I was well on my way. With learner's permit in hand I began to learn how to drive my dad's stick shift Isuzu Trooper. That's a whole story in itself.

After a few month's of practicing and driving on my own. I was ready to go pass the driving test. I took the test 4 times. The first two times I didn't even get on the course. The first time the trooper failed me because I had a cracked windshield. A few weeks later, with a brand new windshield, I returned. I pull up, he takes one look at the truck and says I can't test because a lug nut was missing. The following week I tested, but took too long to parallel park. Then I got it, I was "king of the world".

With license in hand my dad bestowed upon me ownership of the Trooper that I had learned to drive in. By then I had graduated from high school, so I was able to work. One night when I was driving home from work, I got into a bad accident where I struck a pedestrian. I had to go to court. After the fines were paid, they ordered me to do a retest. I had to go to the MVA and in one day take the written, driven, and a break reaction test. I spent the whole day in there. About 30 minutes before they are about to close I pull up in the road test lane in my buddies car. We're sitting there waiting listening to the radio. When it was time to pull up, the go to turn the key,and it wouldn't start. We push it out of the way, and after a few minutes it started. I pull up and I'm last test of the day. I did it, I managed to pass all the test's and keep my license.

About 6 month's later I needed to go to the MVA. The lady pulls my information up. She looks at me and tells me that they have my license suspended. I'm shocked, so I asked what for? She tells me that I was supposed to take retests and didn't. Of course I'm panicking, because I had taken the tests. The very next day I go up the other MVA where I took the tests, with my buddy that had come with me before as a witness.
I get my number and wait my turn. Finally I get up there, and I explain my situation to the person. She looks it up and says that there is no record of me having taken the retest. I'm freaking out. There is a door to a hallway that runs directly behind the counters where I was standing. I can see the door and it is open. At the precise moment that I was loosing my mind I see the guy that did my test walk past the door. I holler out "that's him!! that's the guy that did my tests!!". The guy stops and walks towards us all confused. I'm raising my voice, "hey man you did my tests and they say it's not showing in the computer, can you tell them you did the tests?". He says. "I don't remember doing your tests". Then he walks away. I'm talking to my friend in disbelief, "I can't believe this shit!". The security guard is behind me. Suddenly the guy that I called out comes back with a folder in his hand. He apologizes and tells me that he left the file in his desk drawer for the last six months. I wanted to strangle him.

Over the years my luck had only gotten worse when dealing with them. I have to be totally honest, sometime it was my fault. One time I had gotten a work order for a busted tail light. I never got the damn thing fixed. It wasn't until I need to renew my tags that I scrambled to fix the situation. I had to get the work order signed, then go all the way to Glen Burnie to pay the State Police, and have my tags re-instated in order to renew.

A couple of years ago my father had given me a vehicle. It was a 2002 Izusu Trooper (in case you didn't already know, my dad loves Troopers). I transferred the vehicle in my name and called the insurance company to add the truck. The lady on the phone was so nice, and she even got me a discounted rate. A few month's later I receive a letter from the MVA. It stated that the Izusu did not have insurance and that I needed to show proof or return my tags, they had been suspended. I called the insurance company. No one knows why my coverage was removed on the truck. To get it added back on, they doubled my premium. They faxed something to the MVA and I was good. A few month's after that I get another letter from the MVA, and again they say I don't have insurance on the Trooper and the tags were suspended again. I got everything resolved again.

The three things that I always mess up on and never take care of on time are work orders, emissions tests and tickets. This one time I knew the tags on my Acura were next to expire. Of course I was on the look out for the renewal notice so I could pay and get my sticker. Instead I receive a letter stating that both my cars had suspended tags for failure to complete emissions tests. I start looking online and calling around and realize that I can still ask for an extension and get my plates renewed. When I call to ask for the extension, 2 flags show up. The first was a work order for a busted tail light on my Acura. The other was for unpaid tickets. Again I had to go to Glen Burnie to pay the fine. All I had to do now was pay the tickets. About to years ago I ran a red light leaving Baltimore. It was like a $50 ticket. Around the same time I got a $25 ticket for an expired meter outside my job. I had to call Baltimore city to see how much I had to pay. The red light ticket had a surcharge of $15 so that came up to $65. The parking ticket multiplied up to $350 over the year it went unpaid. I had to make all these moves and pay all this money over my 2 days off.

In the state of Maryland you have renew your driver's license every 5 years. On September 4th of 2010 (My 31st birthday) I was set to renew. Of course as usual I wait till the week of to get my license renewed. I waited until then because I had to get new contact lenses to be able to pass the vision exam. On that Thursday I go the MVA to get it done. I get my number and start waiting. I get called after like an hour. I go up. I have to verify my address and other info. I breeze through the eye exam. I'm happy because I thought the eye exam was going to hold me up. The gentleman that was helping me excuses himself to get a manager. This arrogant French prick comes back to me. He informs me that there was a new law passed that states that the name on your license and social security card have to match.

When I got my first I.D. when I was 15 the only proof of identity I had at the time was my Nicaraguan passport. My passport had both last names (paternal and my moms maiden name). I had never used my second last name I told the person that was helping me. She claimed that she had to type it the way it appears. Since then my I.D. and license always had my name as A. C. Guerrero Navarrete. all of my other documents including work and tax information have me listed as A. C. Guerrero.

The manager at the MVA starts interrogating me. Are you a resident? Do you have a citizenship certificate? Do you have an American passport? I was so pissed at this point. He tells me if I bring my passport and certificate and they match the name on my Social Security card, they can change the name on my license and I can be on my way. I rush home, get the stuff, and return the MVA.
I show the guy my documents. Everything looks good. He just needed put some restriction codes on my license regarding my vision. He asks the lady at the next desk. She looks at his screen and tells him what to enter, then she says, " Now all he has to do is pay that ticket in D.C.". I start to shake my head, and think here we go again.

I go home and call D.C. Finally I get someone on the phone. The person I spoke to explains to me that I had in fact paid that ticket. What happened was that the payment got to them a day late. They tacked on a $100 late fee. I never received a notice. So I pay the fine over the phone. By this time the MVA was closed. I decide I will go to the MVA right after work on Friday to show proof that I paid the ticket and finally get my damn license.
After I leave work I go straight to the MVA. As I'm driving in I notice the parking lot is quite empty. I got exited, because that meant the lines were going to be quick. I get to the door. There was a note reading that they were closed for Labor Day. These bastards were taking 4 days off for Labor Day weekend. My license expired that Saturday. I had to drive with an expired licence for 3 days. The following Tuesday I was finally able to get my brand new license.

I've been licensed to operate a vehicle in the state of Maryland for the past 12 years. Every time I go to the MVA a simple 2 hour process becomes a three day ordeal costing me way more then it's supposed to. Sometimes it was my fault, but I as you read, sometimes they just want to see me squirm.

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