Have you ever stopped to wonder, what would happen if you stopped? Stopped going to that job you hate? Stopped putting up with people's bullshit? Stopped putting yourself last? Stopped caring about people who don't give a shit about you? Stopped putting your time and effort into people and things that aren't benefiting you?
After you stop, you can begin. You can begin to see how things really are. You can begin to see how people truly feel about you. You can begin to see your true value. You can begin to see how much you were sacrificing. You can begin to see the toll on your health and well being.
I've been working for same nationally recognized natural and organic grocer for the past 15 years. I was fortunate enough to encounter a culture of support and the possibility of growth. I was able to learn a trade and become a butcher. With time I was given the opportunity to rise into management. I was young and willing to do what it took to stand out and be noticed. It was also a different time. We were unique in the industry. We wrote our own ticket back then.
Over the last 10 years the industry began to shift. More people began doing what we were doing. Some even better than us. They urged us to focus on customer service, but the consumer wanted value which they could receive elsewhere without the pretentiousness. Nobody really cares where our olive oil comes from anymore when they can get the same olive oil for half price at a competitor.
Then the lay offs happened. They got rid of all instore marketing, healthy eating, and eventually artists. The department's that made us stand out over the years. About 6 months later they announced the buyout. We found out the same day it was announced. Some of us speculated, but we were sure it would be a grocery company. We were bought out instead by a internet conglomerate known for online shopping. The richest man in the world now owns us. What does that men for the brand?
Those of us that have been around for a while we knew that this was the beginning of the end. So far most of the changes have come behind the scenes. They reduced prices on hundreds of staples. They created a weekly discount program linked to their premium membership, but aside from their instore delivery service everything stayed the same on the public side. Behind the scenes expectations changed. Everything became about the bottom line. Make more, spend less. They introduced all these cost cutting and efficiency measures. It wasn't as simple as just doing it. You had to be certified and undergo weekly inspections. It was very strict. Many of my counterparts stepped down due to the added pressure. Sure management did not give any concessions. It was their opportunity to weed out the people they weren't particularly fond of.
As a manager I always gave people the benefit of the doubt. In my mind we are all adults. Grown men and women with bills and responsibilities. Why do I have to tell you what to do everyday. Why do I have to stand over you. With the new expectations store leadership started micromanaging. They looked at things they never noticed before. It became almost comical. I did my best to prepare my team and get everyone on board. They decided to put my team and under the microscope in order to either find a reason to fire me or pressure me to quit.
Then Thanksgiving came along. In a facility as old and as limited in space as ours, you had to be creative around the holidays to be able to fit the excess product and still maintain an organized and tidy department and maintain all the new standards. Nobody in management paid attention on how we struggled the last two year's to work with what we had. You organize the best way you can and hope nothing major happens. This time, instead of receiving all of our holiday product in one drop they sent 4 pallets a day for 2 weeks and we were 4 men down from last season. The other difference was that management lived in our coolers. Constantly criticizing our organizational practices. They made a new habit of calling my regional manager so he could come see the mess. While this was happening, I began experiencing issues with my right hip and leg. I thought I piled something breaking pallets. It got so bad that I decided to go to urgent care, something, that if you know me, I've never done.
I powered through Thanksgiving, my condition getting progressively worse. They reprimanded me after Thanksgiving. It was another nail in my coffin. At this point I either quit or find another location. The thing is I could hardly walk. The week of Christmas I decided to take leave and focus on recovery. I was out until mid January. When I got back I was relieved of my management duties and allowed only to cut meat. It was great. A great pressure had been lifted off my shoulders. Then they began to pressure me to leave or it would be a matter of time before I would be fired.
That's when everything became crystal clear to me. Nobody, not my team, not my managers gave a shit about me. They didn't care about the years I gave them or about my health. They just wanted someone else to kick around. I lost all respect for those people and the company frankly. Unfortunately I was not a position to walk away. I made decent money, had tenure, and knew starting from scratch anywhere else would put me way further down the latter I wanted to be. I sent an email to some of my counterparts and announced I was stepping down and looking to strictly cut meat and I only needed 4 shifts a week.
The response was overwhelming. One of the stores manager, I worked for years ago immediately showed interest. Offered a fair wage above my other prospects. The manager of the department was one of my mentors coming up in the industry so I knew it was a perfect fit. After taking another week off I finally was able to start at my new location. The team is great. They are respectful and hardworking. All I have do is my 8 hours and go home. Everybody does the same. I couldn't ask for a better situation.
So basically in the last 3 months I traded in an impossible situation for a comfortable existence. I work doing what I love 4 days a week. I traded in the extra day to start a small internet business doing the other thing I love to do. I buy and sell vinyl records online. I had a huge collection and realized that I was only listening to about 25% of it. I decided to sell some off to people who would actually enjoy then. I've done better than I expected in the short period of time. This new venture allows me to bring income with almost no physical labor. The hard part is getting in the car and driving to the post office. I also get to spend more time at home with the family.
Overall my current situation is a positive one. Especially on my health. I still have the aches and pains that come with being 40, and holding all this weight up for 8 hours a day. Nothing in comparison to the emotional and psychological abuse I felt on a daily basis in my previous situation. Nothing, not money, not stature, nothing is more important that peace of mind, health and self worth. If you feel defeated everyday, that job is not worth it. Find a situation that agrees better with your needs and lifestyle.
