"Do you want a piece of this (kit-kat) before you stop being chunky again? My wife asked me today. I'm not sure what she was saying. True I have let go since the holidays. I'm slowly getting back into my routine, I want the sun to come out and the temps to stay above 50 again. Meantime I was indulging in all the good stuff. Losing weight is no joke.
Over the past 31 years I have struggled with my weight. I'm not sure if has been a choice or I was doomed to be heavy. Before I turned 6 I was a skinny kid. Then we went to Nicaragua. I'm not sure if seeing so much poverty or the lack of food, but something changed me, I always enjoyed a good Big Mac. I remember seeing the golden arches and telling my folks that I had a headache, and the only way it would go away was a Big Mac. Growing up we maybe ate out once a week. Everything else was cooked at home. The one thing I remember most is the fact I never ate a regular breakfast. I did eat breakfast everyday, but it was never a bowl of cereal or a piece of toast. For as long I can recall my mom would always get up at 4 am and cook a meal. It would consist of a meat, rice and a veggie or salad. Partly so my father could have something for lunch. I would always get that meal for breakfast.
Of course as I got older I would start making my own nutritional choices. One summer my parents bought a deep fryer for the house. So what do they do, go out and get a 5 gallon jug of fry grease, and every frozen item that could be fried that Costco had to offer. My older brother and I were off for summer break. We would make nuggets and french fries everyday. When I was about 15 me and my best friend would go to 7-eleven when we had money. It was always the same prescription. A super big gulp and a family size bag of Utz potato chips each. It took us 10 minutes to walk home, and all the chips and soda would be gone. This was an after school ritual. So once I got home I would probably eat dinner too. Fried foods and soda have always been my weakness. We used to save the plastic big gulp and fast food cups to drink out of. I would fill it with soda to the top. Almost every Sunday growing up in my house it was "fritanga" day. Fritanga is a Spanish word used by Nicaraguans when referring to fried foods. Usually it was fried pork, plantains and yucca. I used to eat till my stomach hurt.
It wasn't always about gorging myself. I tried all kinds of diets and fitness routines. One summer, everyday my father would pile us (my cousins, brother, and I) in his truck and drop us off about 3 miles away from the house on his way to work. We had to walk back, by the time the sun came out it was in the 70s. My mother bought me the entire "Sweating to the oldies" collection. I was actually into it for about a month. I went "vegetarian". I was eating mostly pasta and started gaining weight. The craziest thing I did was the "milk diet". One day I was watching TLC. They were showing cases of extreme weight loss. This one lady was put on a diet that consisted of 3 liters of milk a day. I would eat a cup of corn flakes for break fast. One liter of milk 3 times a day. This lasted for about 2 weeks. Halfway into week 2, I tried to use the bathroom. Nothing came out. I pushed and pushed and got all sweaty. I've never seen it (the poop) tan and waxy before. Then at the end of the week I did the dumbest thing ever. I decided to join my best friend for a cup of coffee at Starbucks. I had a venti sized coffee of the day. I already have a bad history of when i drink anything caffeinated after 5pm I don't sleep at night. This time I did it after not eating solid food for 2 weeks. When I got home that night I got in bed. After midnight I was still wide awake. About 3am I realized my hands were numb. I got worried when I my legs also went numb. When my mom got up at 4am I was huddled in the living room rocking back and forth and shivering.
I don't know why I am the only one in my family with this problem. My father is average size. His heaviest has been around 200lbs. My mom has weight 118 lbs all my life. All my brother and sisters are thin. My older brother Byron is tall and heavy but has always maintained an athletic build. I wish I could eat anything and not gain weight. In past years I had gotten into a bad habit. I ate a lot of red meat. You see I am a butcher. In the 8 hours I spent in the meat room I would get hungry. The easiest fix was cooking a steak. When I didn't have time to eat I would go about 12 hours without food. When I finally got to food I would eat everything in site. I would order to 2 meals from the carryout. I would eat them in one sitting. I would order the value meal with the biggest burger (at least 2 patties of meat) and soda, and a 20 piece nugget or additional chicken sandwich. I never knew what hungry meant. I ate because I was supposed to not because I needed to. I could go 20 hours without food and not feel a thing. I would go out eat like a pig. Afterward if I went too my moms and dinner was ready, I would eat again.
When I finally figured out how to eat is when I started to control my weight. I started by eating more. Yes more. I ate up to 5 times a day. Small low fat and low carb meals. I drank water all day long. I actually started to feel hungry. Every three to four hours I would get an empty stomach. Since I was constantly fueling myself I had more energy and never felt like snacking. What did I do with the extra energy? I walked, then I ran, and then I stopped. From March to November of last year I lost 64 lbs. After Thanksgiving I stopped completely. The short and cold days dissuaded me from working out. I tried but couldn't get out like I did in the summer. Now I know that I have to start over again this Spring. I'm back up to about 270. My original weight loss goal was for 221. I need to lose 50 lbs this season. That is less weight then before.
I ran yesterday and it felt like I never stopped. I want to get back on the horse and make a glorious come back. Losing the weight is easy, keeping it off is difficult. Maintenance is the goal. I will never be able to go back to my old ways. I changed my lifestyle last year. Within the last 3 months I realized that easing back into snacking, soda and irregular eating habits can erase all my progress. I have to do it all over again. Who's with me?
Me!!!
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