The End

Write? Why? What for? I think my writing days are done. Nobody cares about this writing thing anymore. By now everyone knows I hate my life. They should have figured out I don't have the best relationship with my family and that I've contemplated suicide at least twice a year over the last 3 years. In my case conflict always sells. When I was beefing with my brother or when I wanted to quit my job. When I started this 3 years go, I was looking for a way to let go of things that were affecting me. I had never written before. A dear friend encouraged me to begin a blog after reading my year end recap, so after midnight on the first day of 2011, I wrote my first Ghettoblaster.

Then as now I was dealing with life and all the trouble it brings. Self-loathing has always been my bread and butter. I've always written for sympathy. I've also always written for those folks out there that go through  similar insecurities, struggles and doubt. Surprise surprise, life sucks, I just was never ashamed of admitting it. Everyone has problems. Everyone thinks about where their relationships are going or how much longer they can deal with their volatile work environment. When some people read that I was going through things in my life they could relate to, it didn't make it seem as bad as it once did. I also learned how to cope by writing about it. The more I put out there, the more I realized that it wasn't so bad and how to deal with it in real time.

The problem with my evolution and rationalization of everyday problems was that it left me with less and less to write about. I used to be human, now I was just boring. I was like everyone else. I didn't have that edge I once had. My literary temper tantrums were a thing of the past. I didn't really hate my life after all. I learned to cope with my work life and even started to value my place in society. Now what? There is nothing left. I feel that when things run their course and no longer add value to your life it's best to let them go. I had a great 3 year run. I learned a lot about myself. My readers, mostly friends and family, learned more than they expected about me. I think I accomplished my mission and now I must let this chapter in my creative life go on into eternity.

What can I say. First I wanna thank all of my loyal readers. Many of you know me in real life, but got to know another dimension of my existence through these confessional posts. They shared my passions and insecurities. They read my angry posts my rants, and even the occasional drunk post. I was always honest. I got into a lot of trouble. This blog affected the majority of my relationships. My mom didn't talk to me for a month after hearing about what I wrote. This blog almost cost me a job I was going to interview for. Not everything I wrote about was life shattering. I was able share fond memories of my oldest friends and my up bringing. I also shared my dad's story with the world. You never knew what I was going to come up with next.

Now I am done. I have nothing else to write about. I have to get away from laptop and go out and live my life again. Maybe I will experience another lifetime of up and downs and decide to write again. For now, my work is complete. Next Tuesday 12/31/2013 I will write my last Ghettoblaster, by the way of my 2013 year end recap. I hope to write a suitable ending to this not so perfect story. I love and appreciate you all and thank you for reading.