This year I really wasn't looking forward to having a "Merry Christmas" Money is tight, couldn't do the things I wanted and our daughter is away. She went to Nicaragua for the holidays with my parents. That just left me and my wife. I already knew she wasn't going to be any fun. She was already depressed with our daughter being away. She doesn't like it when we're broke. She doesn't admit it, but I think she blames me for the hard times. I try my best with what I have but it just seems to never be enough.
I was able to get her what she wanted and that was accessories for her Nook and a gift card to buy more "Nook Books" She got me a Redskins Christmas stocking, and The Dark Night Rises, which is what I asked for. So we weren't too bad off. However I had planned a eventful Christmas eve with finger foods, tree decorating, hot chocolate, and going to see Christmas light displays. I had even considered going to mass at midnight, which I had never done.
I check my account expecting to see a substantial number. To my surprise it was a fraction of what I expected it to be. I wasn't surprised on how little it was, I was more surprised that it wasn't overdrawn, which usually tends to be the case. Instead of all the wonderful things I planned to do with the money I focused on the necessities and we went grocery shopping. We did decide to get a pork shoulder for Christmas dinner.
We tried to make the best of Christmas eve. We decorated our meager little "Charlie Brown" tree, as the people that saw me proudly purchase it were referring to it. We hung pink and blue glass miniature balls and felt cut out Christmas trees in various colors. It had no lights because none of our light strands worked for some reason. We then watched A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens. It was the 80's version, starring George C. Scott. This was the version that she and I both grew up watching.
I don't know if it was me or if it was her, but the festive spirit was sucked out of the evening. We called our daughter and wished her a Merry Christmas. We argued over dinner and went our separate ways. I grew up relatively poor, but we always celebrated on Christmas eve no matter how little we had. My parents would decorate, cook and play holiday music. I never felt less fortunate. I wanted to be surrounded friends and family. I wanted to cook and drink. Instead I get a long face and nasty attitude.
As you grow older you get less and less by way of presents. I never expect much. I knew my wife's aunt had something for me, and my "Secret Santa" at work. Our course I had received the gifts from my wife. The recurring theme was that I asked for anything Redskins or burgundy and gold. Aside from the Redskins stocking my wife gave me, my secret Santa at work, Barb got a me burgundy and gold stocking cap to match a scarf I had purchased recently from the same place. The night before when my wife visited her cousin for a Christmas party (that I had to work through and missed) she brought home a present from him that I was not to open until Christmas morning.
Christmas eve, I was so not feeling it and tired that I laid down around 10 instead of waiting for midnight as in other years. Since I had nothing else to look forward to, I quietly went into my room and opened the gift from my wife's cousin. I knew it a garment, I never imagined it being a official licenced Washington Redskins Nike home jersey. It's just like the ones the players wear. Everything stitched, with the NFL shield just above the Redskins emblem. I never in million years imagined owning one, let alone receiving one for Christmas. I felt so happy and humbled that someone would do something like that for me. It's so nice that I wasn't sure if I even wanted to wear it or frame it. The cousin that gave it to me is a die hard fan and a close friend of mine, but somehow he knew I really wanted one and would never buy it myself. Thanks Brent.
The next morning I got up early and finished watch Batman for the second time. We then cooked breakfast together. I think we were both in better spirits by them. We played music. We cooked different dishes for Christmas dinner. We watched A Christmas Story, which is one of my favorite movies. We even played some board games. I really enjoyed our time together.
This morning I wake up and find it snowing. A little disappointed that it waited until the day after Christmas to snow. The good thing is that I still have today and tomorrow off from work. Now if it would only stop snowing so I could go see my friends and family, which all I really wanted for Christmas in the first place.
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